Have you ever been sneezed on? It’s pretty gross. You might feel repulsed, and given that there’s still COVID, angry. However, the person might actually be really sick. Only in relationships do we take another person’s symptoms to mean a direct reflection of us. Even if somebody is having an allergic reaction to your cologne or perfume, it isn’t your cologne or perfume that’s the problem, it’s their immune system that is overreacting. Similarly, when somebody overreacts to us it is often their emotional immune system overreacting as well. We need to ask ourselves is the reaction disproportionate to what we did. If so we can rationalize that the other person’s emotional immune system is being triggered. Once you realize that we can elicit empathy and gently ask the person if they are ok, just as we would if they were physically sick.
Note: Make sure when you ask them if they are OK that you are not being condescending and that you ask them in a soft gentle voice. If they still are responding negatively give them space.
Coffee Fact: Coffee beans come from the seeds of a fruit called the coffee cherry, which grows on trees found in over 70 countries worldwide. The two most common species of coffee plants are Arabica and Robusta.